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#176822 - 03/17/06 10:01 AM
Taking a break…
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NtroducingMyself
Moderator
Registered: 07/06/05
Posts: 6949
Loc: Canton, OH USA
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As the title of the thread states, I am taking a break from this website. This week has been a very hard week for me here, not with just Angel leaving, but because of a few PM’s I received.
I will not mention names, though a few of you on the boards will know whom I speak of. You all know I am gay, and I am very proud of who I am and what I have accomplished so far in my life. But when someone, for no reason, sends me a PM and called me a “fag” along with a list of other hateful personal attacks, I will take offense. It’s one thing if I deserve such an attack, I’ll take it with a grain of salt. But to be attacked for no reason, is unacceptable.
I thought I did the right thing by contacting the mods/admin letting them know about the mailing so they can correct the issue before it go to out of hand. I know most of them were not too happy about the PM that was sent to me and they let the other member know to basically knock it off. I thought it all blew over and was taken care of. Unfortunately I received another PM from this member, yet again calling me a “fucking fag” and doing their best to degrade me.
The problem is, my issue really doesn’t just lay on this members hate words (Though it was childish and simply ignorant) it also falls on a certain mod/admin and their lack of respect and hateful words. When someone of authority calls you a “a whiney little bitch” and to “grow some balls” and right down defends the other members hateful actions, how can one stay on a site and not feel disrespected and unwanted as a member? I thought I was doing something we were all direct to do, and that’s if we receive a PM that is uncalled for we notify the mods/admin for them to handle the situation.
It can be debated left and right that words should not offend someone over the Internet. But when someone takes a sensitive part of someone life, like their sexuality, and make dig after dig about it and than twist with a knife and than to top it off have someone of authority defend their actions and to also call you names and degrade you, how could you not take offense? If the tables were turned and I personally attacked this other member, I know I would have been banned from the site immediately, as people should if the problem continues. Unfortunately, favoritism, in my opinion, won out this time.
I do want to say thank you to the mods that were upstanding and took this matter seriously and stood behind me, which means more to me than you know. You are great people and will always hold you in high regards and hope for nothing but the best for you. There are also a lot of members here that I have such great respect for, but I won’t list them because this post will be longer than it already has become.
I hope some day I return to this site, because I really do enjoy the concept of the site along with it’s members. I am not stomping off in a childish fit because “I didn’t get my way” it’s call I am mature enough to know I just need to step back and let time to heal all the damage that has been done. Will it take a couple weeks, a couple months? Who knows? I just know I hope to return to the site.
If any of you want my e-mail address please feel free to send me a PM, as I will check my PM’s the next few days for my friends I have made here. I have great respect for so many people here, that it almost painful to leave, but I know it’s the right thing to do right now.
Take care and be safe!!
_________________________
"Don't be a Dork! Wrap your Pork!"
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#176823 - 03/17/06 11:20 AM
Re: Taking a break…
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winged
member
Registered: 02/10/05
Posts: 407
Loc: Northern New Jersey / NYC, USA
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That's not cool. I always thought this place was (mostly) gay-friendly or else I wouldn't be posting here. It's a real shame when people stoop to that level. 
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#176824 - 03/17/06 11:36 AM
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Anonymous
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#176827 - 03/17/06 02:40 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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DxLISHxISx_43
Delicious Member
Registered: 09/29/04
Posts: 2666
Loc: Cleveland
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It doesn't matter how you handled it. No one deserves to get harrassing pm's. It has been mentioned numerous times that we should go to a mod if we recieve pm's such as this.....and now nothing is being done?!?!
So this person has been here for a long time, so they are an exception to the rule? And if I send this person a few pm's calling them names it would be cool, right? I just need a clarification on the rules. And this pm is coming from a member who claims this site is for helping people and we all should be nice to people asking questions, even trolls. But then behind the scenes they are nothing but a hypocritical coward!
Just remember, what goes around comes around.
Eddie, I am absolutely disgusted with this place. There are many young kids that will miss out on your advice. How sad.
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~I tried to be good, but then I got bored~
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#176828 - 03/17/06 02:45 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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ImBob
member
Registered: 01/22/05
Posts: 925
Loc: Texas
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I can understand this. I myself have been dissappointed in some of the actions and things that have been said on these boards by people whose job it is to keep that type of speech and whatnot off of the boards.
Please do come back soon, though. I suspect that many members will leave within the next month and then the new generation of these boards will come about. Then you can be there to help start it off right.
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#176829 - 03/17/06 02:47 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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Amanda
Moderator
Registered: 12/23/01
Posts: 8836
Loc: United States
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Yes something has been done. It's been taken care of and was taken care of from the beginning.
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~*~Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your mouth.~*~
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#176830 - 03/17/06 02:52 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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DxLISHxISx_43
Delicious Member
Registered: 09/29/04
Posts: 2666
Loc: Cleveland
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In reply to:
Unfortunately I received another PM from this member, yet again calling me a “fucking fag” and doing their best to degrade me.
It was taken care of from the beginning?
_________________________
~I tried to be good, but then I got bored~
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#176831 - 03/17/06 02:59 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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Amanda
Moderator
Registered: 12/23/01
Posts: 8836
Loc: United States
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Yes it was.
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#176832 - 03/17/06 04:14 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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ajmakoko
longstanding member
Registered: 06/18/05
Posts: 1115
Loc: Nebraska
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I've noticed the avatars- there are people with pro-homosexuality or anti-gay ones... Reminds me of when we all had puppy or kitty avatars.
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You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
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#176833 - 03/17/06 04:30 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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Java_Addict
Longstanding Member
Registered: 03/02/05
Posts: 4822
Loc: My heart's in Israel
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except the puppy and kitty ones were nice lol
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#176834 - 03/17/06 04:37 PM
Re: Taking a break\
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ajmakoko
longstanding member
Registered: 06/18/05
Posts: 1115
Loc: Nebraska
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Shyeah... I'd rather have the puppy and kitty ones back though. Not surprising huh?
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no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
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#176835 - 03/17/06 04:43 PM
Re: Taking a break\
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Java_Addict
Longstanding Member
Registered: 03/02/05
Posts: 4822
Loc: My heart's in Israel
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Nope. It just irritates me that people feel the need to try to degrade others. Blah...So, Who wants to go back to the puppy's and kitties? lmao
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Pinatas promote violence against flamboyant animals.
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#176836 - 03/17/06 05:37 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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mazkat
member
Registered: 06/01/05
Posts: 855
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this is really sad...i agree, we shun people who send sexually inappropraite PMs yet when someone is out of hand with social matters, as in being homophobic, they get away with it..either way i dont know what happened..
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#176837 - 03/17/06 06:31 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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Ninjasword71
member
Registered: 02/18/05
Posts: 906
Loc: Canada
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Hey...Homer has had gay tendancies in some episodes of Simpsons, does that make me a gay lover?
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This Shits The Shit
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#176838 - 03/17/06 07:28 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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winged
member
Registered: 02/10/05
Posts: 407
Loc: Northern New Jersey / NYC, USA
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Oh, you are totally a gay lover, Ninjasword71! C'mere you! 
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#176840 - 03/17/06 10:05 PM
Re: Taking a break
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Grvtykllr
Magnificent Mountaineering Member
Registered: 10/18/05
Posts: 6294
Loc: Any Vertical plane I can find
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Odd that this was brought up, or atleat the timing of it.
when I was on for a few minutes this morning before I took off to take of some of my shit I was thinking about the dog vs cat wars of a few months ago because of the gay vs anti gay avatars I was starting to see pop up the last few days.
Eddie said he was taking a break, not leaving, angel said she was hoping that later she would be welcomed back with open arms.
If anything gets you this upsetf then taking a break may not be a bad idea.
is it bullshit? yes it is but its also already happened, you can not conrtol the past only how the same incident is handled in the future. its never a bad idea to take a break fro your regular routine though, you may just find something you enjoy by doing so or what you left may be a bit better when you come back to it later.
pissed off about the site?
take a break, come back later and see if what pissed ya off is still a problem if it still bothers ya or is still a problem, leave again. its an online forum, the mods are aware of the problems, take a break and give them some time to work shit out and decide what to do and how to handle it, nothing good ever happens over night, good things take some time its the bad shit that happens quikly
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Let's agree to respect each others views, no matter how wrong yours may be.
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#176841 - 03/17/06 10:42 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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damien
longstanding member
Registered: 01/23/05
Posts: 3803
Loc: Mayberry
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I am soooo gonna get reamed for this. But I'm right, so I'll take the abuse.
You are using "out of hand with social matters" and "homophobic" to negatively characterize someone who posts thoughts about homosexuality that you don't necessarily agree with. That's not helpful, nor is it fair. One of the problems I've seen on this site is that, when someone posts someting others disagree with, instead of engaging/challenging the belief/statement/idea, folks typically respond by besmirching the character of the person who posted the thing they disagree with. I hate that when it happens in politics and I hate it when it happens here.
The guy wasn't out of hand and he wasn't being homophobic. So how about getting beyond that kind of rhetoric and stating rational objections to his post.
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Screw the whales, save the subjunctive!
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#176843 - 03/17/06 10:59 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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damien
longstanding member
Registered: 01/23/05
Posts: 3803
Loc: Mayberry
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Oh...wait...my bad....
Took me a while to catch up. I was just reading another thread where someone posted...you know...and then I came here and forgot what thread I was reading so...
...anyhoo...I think I know what you're talking about now.
And if I do...it was grossly inappropriate.
I think I need more sleep...
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Screw the whales, save the subjunctive!
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#176844 - 03/17/06 11:08 PM
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Anonymous
Anonymous
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#176845 - 03/17/06 11:13 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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RobBob
longstanding member
Registered: 10/17/04
Posts: 1391
Loc: Alberta, Canada
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He may not have been homophobic in truth, but the guy was definitely an ass. I have to agree though that it's being taken a little too personally, considering the fact that this forum engages a wide range of opinions and beliefs and you naturally will get pricks with little respect for others who type crap like that. Members shouldn't necessarily be dealt with by means of banning just because they oppose another members beliefs and are assholes about it. A certain amount of leniency should be tolerated on these forums.
Nevertheless, continual offenders should be dealt with. The way you stated it though, you were surprised he wasn't dealt with more harshly after doing it only once (and he then proceeded to message you again). You need to remember that a lot of forums tolerate behaviour like that and unless you want to stamp down your foot without breaking in new members, we won't have a lot of people.
One of the unique things about this forum is the fact that we actually care about moderating aggravating or abusive behaviour, where many forums of various different themes or topics will hardly do any policing of members. At the same time, we try to promote a policy open discussion and freedom of opinion. I've been realizing more and more that this forum has become too whiny about the small things and we're making huge deals over insults and contrasting opinions instead of discussing/arguing the issues and talking about the actual issues instead of the members. We don't talk about the opinions anymore, we just talk about the conflict. It's like American politics, lol. All the attention is focused on the faults of the politician rather than the complex issues and true national impacts that they will have on the US.
Don't feel I'm attacking you NtroducingMyself, I'm discussing the topic just as I said. I agree that guy who sent you the messages was a prick, I just don't necessarily agree with the rest to the same extent as you. I'm using this to start a discussion about the state of this forum. Whether or not this turns into a string of replies that say I'm being heartless isn't up to me, it's up to everyone who responds.
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Neo-Cortex, Frontal Lobe
Brainstem! Brainstem!
Hippocampus, Neural Node, Right Hemisphere...
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#176846 - 03/17/06 11:37 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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damien
longstanding member
Registered: 01/23/05
Posts: 3803
Loc: Mayberry
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I agree. I'm kind of getting it from both sides.
There is so much more to be done here than all that.
My post was basically just trying to say I misunderstood and thought she was talking about something else.
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Screw the whales, save the subjunctive!
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#176848 - 03/17/06 11:47 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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RobBob
longstanding member
Registered: 10/17/04
Posts: 1391
Loc: Alberta, Canada
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Ah, sorry. I wasn't even replying to the post you made before I posted that, I clicked on and replied to the post before that but it took my long enough to write that you'd posted once again by the time I responded. Also, I started off replying to you then moved on to more general things and talking to Ntroducing. Sorry if it was confusing, I don't generally make a new post replying to the other member but instead just put everything in a single post.
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Brainstem! Brainstem!
Hippocampus, Neural Node, Right Hemisphere...
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#176850 - 03/19/06 02:34 AM
Re: Taking a break…
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JoeBloggs
member
Registered: 12/12/05
Posts: 996
Loc: New Zealand
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I've seen some of these "pro-heterosexuality" like "stright pride" etc...
Everyone has the right to be proud of who they are, but most people are proud of what differentiates them. So being proud of being straight seems to me like being proud of having hair, or being right handed...
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"Believe those who are seeking the truth; doubt those who find it"
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#176851 - 03/19/06 12:15 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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damien
longstanding member
Registered: 01/23/05
Posts: 3803
Loc: Mayberry
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I think it comes from living in a society that seems to want us to think that if we're part of a majority, not only should we not be proud of who we are, we should be ashamed of it.
That sucks.
I'm proud of being white and I'm proud of being a man.
If I were black or asian or slavic or a woman or a turtle, I'd be proud of that too.
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Screw the whales, save the subjunctive!
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#176852 - 03/19/06 12:25 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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ME_MYSELF_AND_I
member
Registered: 01/05/05
Posts: 811
Loc: OHIO USA
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In reply to:
I'm proud of being white
That reminded me of something. My professor, a white man, believes that there is no such thing as white pride. He argues that there is nothing white to be proud of. You can have german pride, irish pride, italian pride, wherever-you-are-from pride. But white pride is a sham, and often equated with racism.
Im not trying to start an argument, but Im curious as to what everyone think about this.
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The most valuable and useful of all talents and abilities is that of never using two words or descriptions when one will do or suffice.
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#176853 - 03/19/06 01:51 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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RobBob
longstanding member
Registered: 10/17/04
Posts: 1391
Loc: Alberta, Canada
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The reason for that attitude is that he's probably never been in a country where he's one of the few white people. Honestly, one of the reasons for racial pride based on skin colour rather than a specific nationality seems to be the lack of people of that nationality in the area they live. It doesn't mean much to have Kenya pride if you're the only guy from Kenya, but to be proud to be black you'll find a hell of a lot of more people who share that seem feeling.
I feel great pride for who I am as an individual. I also have pride for other things I'm a part of. Sure, I guess I feel a certain amount of pride for my skin colour. Doesn't mean I have anything against people with other skin colours, I just respect myself and others the way we are (except of course negative things like being an asshole).
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Brainstem! Brainstem!
Hippocampus, Neural Node, Right Hemisphere...
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#176854 - 03/19/06 02:33 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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damien
longstanding member
Registered: 01/23/05
Posts: 3803
Loc: Mayberry
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I think that's typical college/university-professor-multiculturalism bs.
White pride is not racism any more than black pride is racism. It is wrong to equate white pride with white supremacy. Two totally different things. You would think a college professor would have the discernment skills to know that.
I am proud of my race and my skin color, neither of which are superior or inferior to any other race or skin color.
I think your professor is the sham. You should get your money back.
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Screw the whales, save the subjunctive!
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#176855 - 03/19/06 02:44 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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ME_MYSELF_AND_I
member
Registered: 01/05/05
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Loc: OHIO USA
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I dont think he is a sham. Its very interesting to hear his point of view, being a white guy in america against white pride. He's working on an article about this subject. He argues that black pride is justified, but white pride isnt. His entire argument rests on the premise that there is nothing about the category "white" to be proud of. Im curious as to what you mean when you say you are proud to be white? To semi-quote the above poster, is it the same as right-handed pride? or straight pride? or hair pride? What exactly is white pride?
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The most valuable and useful of all talents and abilities is that of never using two words or descriptions when one will do or suffice.
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#176856 - 03/19/06 04:21 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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winged
member
Registered: 02/10/05
Posts: 407
Loc: Northern New Jersey / NYC, USA
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In reply to:
I'm proud of being white and I'm proud of being a man.
If I were black or asian or slavic or a woman or a turtle, I'd be proud of that too.
Okay, that's neat 'n all, but how often are people chastised for being white and/or straight? Especially straight. Society, as a whole, usually has no problem with the majority of anything. When was the last time someone yelled "Fuckin' breeder!" in your face, or the last time a group of gay guys beat the stuffing out of a straight boy just for walking on the same side of the street and looking in their direction?
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#176857 - 03/19/06 05:31 PM
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Anonymous
Anonymous
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#176858 - 03/19/06 05:43 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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winged
member
Registered: 02/10/05
Posts: 407
Loc: Northern New Jersey / NYC, USA
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I'd like to think that essentially there are no differences between us, that we're all just carbon bags of water roaming this blue planet, but in reality there are differences. Pretending they don't exist and trying not to understand each other better get us no where. You need to work through that to get to the state where you only see the carbon bags of water.
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#176860 - 03/19/06 10:57 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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damien
longstanding member
Registered: 01/23/05
Posts: 3803
Loc: Mayberry
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Man. I don't even know where to start with this.
What does pride have to do with oppression and being a minority? Nothing. If Connecticut wins the NCAA tourney, do they not have a right to be proud? They are the dominant team. They aren't being oppressed. Do they not then have a right to be proud? The two have absolutely nothing to do with each other.
In fact, I have indeed been ridiculed for being a white man. I know that happens to white men one time for every 1,234,455 times it happens to a black man, but I 'm just answering your question.
In reply to:
It's hard to get some in the majority to see the ones in the minority's point of view on different types of issues.
That is such the patronizing bullshit. I'm sorry, I like you Krystal (sp), but you are way out of line. To take what I wrote about being proud of who I am and twist it into another diatribe about how the majority just doesn't get it. That's a cheap shot and it is a refusal to discuss what the real issue is.
I am growing weary of this. I am a champion of everyone's rights. White, black, red, gay, straight, men, women, whoever. Hell, I'm getting a masters in Social Work so I can advocate for those who are getting the short end of the stick. And to have people self-righteously calling me on the carpet saying I'm clueless and ignorant about race relations because I said I am proud to be a white man...that is wrong.
I'll say it once again so you can all disagree and flame me again: Everyone has a right - AND REASONS - to be proud of their race, color, religion, geographical location, whatever. No one is exempt from this. Certainly not minorities. And not even majorities.
You don't assure pride and human dignity to one group by denying it to another.
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Screw the whales, save the subjunctive!
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#176861 - 03/19/06 11:07 PM
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Anonymous
Anonymous
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#176862 - 03/19/06 11:40 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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Ineligible
Administrator
Registered: 08/09/01
Posts: 13492
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In reply to:
Everyone has a right - AND REASONS - to be proud of their race, color, religion, geographical location, whatever.
If that pride is acceptance of self, then I agree. But if that pride is an arrogant sort that looks down on others, then I think no-one should have it.
I think people in dominant cultures, ethnicities, etc, have less need to cultivate pride, because they are not having it put down, demeaned, or overlooked. Some minorities (e.g. rich people) may have less need to cultivate it, too. Pride cultivation should be seen as something temporary.
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#176863 - 03/19/06 11:49 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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ME_MYSELF_AND_I
member
Registered: 01/05/05
Posts: 811
Loc: OHIO USA
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Calling someone's opinion partonizing bullshit surely begins to shut the door on intelligent conversation. Just goes to show how far this nation still has to go. We pretend like things are fine, but in reality we cant even really talk about race without someone getting sand in their panties.
I'm wondering why you ignored my question. It wasnt rhetorical. If Connecticut wins the NCAA tourney, sure they have the right to be proud. What has the category white done to make you proud? what is white pride?
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The most valuable and useful of all talents and abilities is that of never using two words or descriptions when one will do or suffice.
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#176864 - 03/20/06 09:58 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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damien
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Registered: 01/23/05
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I can't believe I've gotten myself into this.
This whole thread is totally misrepresenting who I am.
In reply to:
I don't see why you're getting upset.
Well...let me see if I can help you. And hopefully you (all) will be as open to hearing me as you want me to be to hearing you. (And I promise I'm hearing you.)
In reply to:
I've talked to many whites who just don't understand why those in the minority worry about discrimination.
Absolutely. There are still an alarming number of people who think that since the institution of slavery is illegal, we don't have a race problem any more. In some of them it's denial, in others it's idealism. At any rate, it's shortsighted and naive.
In reply to:
You guys think everything is so rosy and peachy. Many whites live in a parochial bubble. You tend to seperate yourself from what's really going on to minorities and you act shocked when you hear about a hate crime.
This is where we start getting to what bothers me. You are using the term "you" to paint with a broad brush. Yes, there are white folks that are guilty of what you're saying. But not all. It is very prejudicial of you to speak as though all white folks think alike and act alike. Haven't we learned that yet.
I don't separate myself from what's going on with minorities. In fact, I don't separate myself from minorities. Believe it or not, I'm rather "mixed in". And please tell me one time when I've acted shocked to hear about hate crime? You can't. Because I'm not. You are, once again, seeing me and portraying me as just a white man, nothing more.
In reply to:
I don't mind you being proud that you are white. What you need to realize is that when you go around saying "I'm proud to be white," that that saying originated from white people's fears that black power and pride meant kill whitey when it wasn't.
I definitely understand what you are saying, which is why I don't go around saying "I'm proud of being white." I've got more sense and cooth than that. However, while I do agree that some of that kind of thinking might stem from fears of what black pride means, some of it also comes from being made to feel like, as a white man, I have no history, no culture, nothing interesting about me, and nothing to take pride it.
I will also add that, as Ineligible alluded to, my "proud of being white" is nothing more than acceptance of who I am. Not acceptance in the "well, I got the short end of the stick so I should just accept it." I mean acceptance as in, this is who I am so it must be good.
I think it is just sad how one person can make a comment and it automatically triggers this whole package of assumptions and accusations based on certain larger demographic groups to which that person belongs. It's not right to do that to minorities and it's not right to do that to those who aren't minorities.
(Although, it might interest you to know that within the circles where I live/exist/operate, I am a minority.)
I hope that at least starts to clarify where I'm coming from.
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Screw the whales, save the subjunctive!
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#176865 - 03/20/06 10:10 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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damien
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In reply to:
We pretend like things are fine, but in reality we cant even really talk about race without someone getting sand in their panties.
First of all, I wasn't pretending like things are fine. It really disturbs me that you guys are drawing those kinds of assumptions about me based on nothing. It's like you've heard about this and discussed this in classes and other places so much that everyone either has to be one extreme or the other. If I make a comment indicating that I don't hate myself for being white, all of a sudden I'm a racist. That's crap.
As for your "getting sand in their panties" comment, I think when folks start portraying me as racist for absolutely no reason, I have a bit of a right to be defensive and a little upset.
In reply to:
What has the category white done to make you proud? what is white pride?
You know what. I'm not gonna answer that. My experience here is that if I say anything short of "forgive me for being white. I'm a horrible wretched person", it will be seen as a disparaging remark toward minorities. So why should I bother?
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Screw the whales, save the subjunctive!
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#176866 - 03/20/06 10:43 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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LoveBritish
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Registered: 12/03/04
Posts: 2166
Loc: Texas
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In reply to:
You know what. I'm not gonna answer that. My experience here is that if I say anything short of "forgive me for being white. I'm a horrible wretched person", it will be seen as a disparaging remark toward minorities. So why should I bother?
You don't have to explain yourself Damien. I, personaly, do not view you as a racist and I see nothing wrong in being 'proud' of who you are regaurdless of color. I, myself, am very proud of the person I've grown to be. Be 'proud' of who and what you are and don't allow someone to paint/brand you as a racist based on a comment that had nothing to do with racism.
_________________________
things we've learned from the movies - - when they're alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other...
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#176867 - 03/20/06 11:18 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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ajmakoko
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Registered: 06/18/05
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I'm sorry, but I think it's sort of dumb to be proud of something you had to be. You had no choice in what gender you came to be, or what race you are. What is there to be proud of, being a human? You did nothing to be that way. Be proud of what you have done, and the person (on the inside) you have become.
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You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
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#176868 - 03/21/06 12:26 AM
Re: Taking a break…
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damien
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The first definition listed for pride in the American Heritage Dictionary is "A sense of one's proper dignity or value; self-respect."
That has absolutely NOTHING to do with what you do, what you've done, choices, or race. Nothing. It's about inherent dignity and self-worth
The first definition listed for proud in the American Heritage Dictionary is "Feeling pleasurable satisfaction." If I say I am proud to be a man, or white, or right-handed, or Irish, or whatever, it's because I find pleasure in being those things and AM SATISFIED in being those things. Nothing more, nothing less.
Edited by damien (03/21/06 12:27 AM)
_________________________
Screw the whales, save the subjunctive!
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#176869 - 03/21/06 04:21 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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ME_MYSELF_AND_I
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Registered: 01/05/05
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Im not saying you are a racist, so please dont misunderstand me. I scrolled up and I dont even see where its implied that you are one. If anything you are the one who is getting upset and calling people names.
My dictionary (Webster's New World) defines pride, in addition to your sound bite of a definition, as:
an unduly high opinion of oneself: haughtiness arrogance,
satisfaction in something done, owned, etc. Which makes ajmakoko's definition just as valid as yours is. Which is why I asked you how you define white pride, because we could all whip out our dictionaries but it wouldn't mean anything.
I'm simply tryng to understand you. If you wont answer my question here, PM it to me. Refusing to answer the question based on how you think people might react looks like a cop out to me. Im not trying to bash/flame you, I'm just interested in gaining some insight, thats all.
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The most valuable and useful of all talents and abilities is that of never using two words or descriptions when one will do or suffice.
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#176870 - 03/21/06 04:30 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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StrapingYoungLad
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Registered: 07/31/05
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I believe the problem comes from that we right-wingers are so tired of being made out to be the bad guys that we are quick to snap at people who dont understand us.
But anyway...I'm so goddam proud that pride is oozing outa my ears. God bless.
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#176871 - 03/21/06 04:43 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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ME_MYSELF_AND_I
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Registered: 01/05/05
Posts: 811
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Not all white people are bad. I get that, but why snap at somebody who comes in peace, lol? I could see if I had some type of hidden agenda to make someone look bad, like a racist, then sure get defensive. As soon as someone questions an idea, we dont have to get super-defensive and accuse people of accusing you(not you) of being a racist. Its ridiculous. If we cant have a discussion, then we just perpetuate the stereotypes.
It turns into us vs. them, and we're right back where we started from.
_________________________
The most valuable and useful of all talents and abilities is that of never using two words or descriptions when one will do or suffice.
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#176872 - 03/21/06 04:50 PM
Re: Taking a break…
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damien
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Registered: 01/23/05
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I think you're on to the problem. I used the word proud based on a clear, ligitimate, dictionary definition. Folks responded to me based on the assumption that I was using the "haughty" definition.
In reply to:
Im not saying you are a racist, so please dont misunderstand me. I scrolled up and I dont even see where its implied that you are one.
When things like this are said, directed at me:
In reply to:
I've talked to many whites who just don't understand why those in the minority worry about discrimination. You guys think everything is so rosy and peachy. Many whites live in a parochial bubble. You tend to seperate yourself from what's really going on to minorities and you act shocked when you hear about a hate crime.
The implication is that I'm racist. If I'm wrong about that, please help me understand how.
What upsets me is that those who responded to me seemed to do so based on their assumptions about the use of that word, with complete and utter disregard of who I am and how I have presented myself on this site.
And in defense of myself, I don't believe I called anyone names. If you can point out where I did so, I will quickly apologize.
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Screw the whales, save the subjunctive!
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