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#24542 - 09/01/04 09:39 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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Anonymous
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great story clymaxx
that is the reason why i started this thread
its great to hear storys where the observer was so cool about it.
i have a couple questions tho
did u ever talk to your dad after that incident?
and would it be too much to ask to tell us what happened when u walked in on ur own kids? did u talk to them after or just let them be?
tnanx for your post!  :)
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#24543 - 09/03/04 07:58 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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Mao Tin Ovdung
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Just got busted for the first time today so this is fresh.
I've been married for 21 years and have the house the 3 kids the whole 9 yards. My wife took my son out to run some errands that I was sure would take a few hours at least to complete. I'm not in my sexual prime at this point in my life but still enjoy a little roll in the hay even if it is just with myself. My wife works nights and has done so for the past 15 years, I never got used to it.
Our privacy has also suffered as the kids got older making relations very difficult unless the house is totally empty. To make a painful story short, My wife went out today but forgot to bring the credit card that she intended to shop with. To make matters worse 2 months ago I suffered a slight hearing loss in my left ear,the ear that was facing the hallway that I would soon see her marching down! Good ol' Murphy was hard at work today my friends.I had just finished so i was not in the throes of solo passion when she appeared in the open doorway.I tried to throw something over the discharge only to realize in horror that it was a pair of her jeans that she had left on the bed! This was the single most embarrassing moment in either one of our lives. The episode is only 3 hours old and my wife is very upset and feeling totally inadequate. I'm trying very hard to clear up the many misconceptions about masturbation and could use some help. Heeeeellllllllllpppppp!!!!!!!!
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#24544 - 09/03/04 08:27 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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lance
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Oh man, that sucks. The embarssment and guilt over that must be kicking your butt. I don't quite know how I'd handle that. How do you convince her that masturbation is normal and we all do it...when you've got semen on her jeans. And how do you overcome her feelings of inadequacy over this.
Honesty is always the best policy. You needed some relief and expected her to be gone for a while. I'd just put it out there that way and then give her time to begin to laugh about it! Then you do the same. But I don't think this is going to go away soon.
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#24545 - 09/03/04 08:44 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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Mao Tin Ovdung
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Thanks for the support Lance. My wife was brought up strict Catholic so this is pretty heavy for her. I can already see the humor of it but don't dare make light of it yet. I feel like George Costanza when his mother busted him and hurt her back in the process. I'm usually as careful as a cigar smoker in a dynamite factory with this and am so pissed at being so careless. It is helping to discuss it in a forum where I'm not alone. I don't think I'll ever forget the look of utter disust and revulsion as she did an about face and closed the door that I should have closed and locked. I almost wished that she had caught me with another woman instead. Shit....I don't know.
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#24546 - 09/03/04 09:00 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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lance
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No man, you don't want that at all. I totally understand her feelings and that Catholic background is huge for her in terms of this. How about a laugh? If you jump up on this thread you'll find a recent story from me in the showers in a locker room....I could have crawled under the floor..and although I'd like to think the guy didn't see...I know he knew what I was up to. I'm willing to keep up the chat if it'll help you move beyond this some.
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#24547 - 09/03/04 09:36 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories - Apartment Mgr
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SeanAmbrose
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In reply to:
This much I know, Cheryl did mention something to my apartment manager Janice about the incident (which I'll mention in story #2 at a later time) and I did find out what Cheryl thought through Janice.
Story # 2 - My apartment manager
In my other story I told you about my apartment and how it is set up. What I didn't mention is that on the first floor the building has a management office that consists of an apartment manager and secretary. Whenever there is a need for maintenance you call down to the office and either the secretary Laura or the manager Janice would do the paperwork and have somebody do the work needed. A quick description of Janice: 5 ft 5 in, long straight blonde hair, brown eyes. Very slim/petite. She's cute, but not drop dead gorgeous. If I were to take a girl home to mom, it would be someone like her.
I had been working long hours at my job for a two week period since things were so busy at the office so I was granted some comp time. I ended up taking a comp day one Monday and made a long weekend of it.
It was a little after 11 AM when I was (a) bored and (b) horny so I went through my collection of magazines and pulled out my December 1992 issue of Penthouse magazine. That has always been one of my favorite magazines. It features a pictoral and article on Bill Clinton's mistress Gennifer Flowers and the Pet of the Month was this absolutely gorgeous woman named Anja Josefsen. Think of a hotter, more voluptuous version of Paulina Porizkova with a bit of a naughty streak and a better body and you've got Anja.
So I find my magazine and strip down totally naked for a session of self love. I prop up my pillows against the wall, I get comfortable sitting on my bed leaning against the wall and lube up the palm of my right hand for a long, slow, and intense wank. When I take my time and the stimulation lasts over a longer period of time, I find that my orgasms are much more intense. To add to the mood, I turn on my stereo and put CDs from Shania Twain and Faith Hill in the 5 CD changer and set the player for random play.
So I'm there spread eagled on my bed slowly enjoying myself with the magazine open to Anja's pictures between my legs. After about 40 minutes I caught some movement from the corner of my eye and to my astonishment I saw my apartment manager Janice who had walked into my bedroom and yelped a "Oh my God! I'm sorry" and turned around and ran out of my apartment. I felt like a deer in headlights and Janice's unexpected entry had killed the mood and softened my penis. After sitting there stunned for 10 - 15 minutes I ended up continuing and coming to orgasm about 5 minutes later. I went to the bathroom to take a shower and when I got out of the shower I saw that I had a call and a voicemail message. I listened to it and it was Janice apologizing for the embarassing incident that had just happened and for me to call her downstairs so she could explain what happened.
Instead, I changed and took the elevator downstairs to the office. I went in and noticed that there was somebody filling in for Laura at the secretary desk. I asked if Janice was in the office and told her that I got her phone call. She came out of her office to say hello and asked me to come into her office and closed the door behind her. She apologized for the incident and proceeded to explain to me that the temp filling in for Laura took a voicemail message for a maintenance for apartment three thirty and accidentally wrote apartment three thirteen (my apartment) on the maintenance request. She had gone upstairs to see what work was needed so she could make the necessary phone calls, knocked and got no answer and came into the apartment. She could hear the stereo when she came into my unit and went to check to see if anybody was home. She aplogized again for what happened and said that she should have known better because of what Cheryl said (see story # 3). I wasn't sure what to say and Janice proceeded to mention that Cheryl told her the story of how she walked in on my calling out her name during masturbation. I said "the two of you must have had a big laugh about that" and she said that Cheryl was actually very embarassed about the whole thing and was surprised that anybody would think about her while they jerk off. I told Janice that I thought Cheryl was absolutely hot and if she didn't have that boyfriend, I'd probably have hit on her long ago. I asked if Cheryl said anything else and she said that I was a very athletic and fit man from the technique that she saw. I blushed again and told Janice that I couldn't believe that the two of them were discussing my masturbation technique. I also asked if anybody else knew and Janice said that Cheryl was too embarassed to tell anybody and that the only reason that Cheryl told her was because she wanted to know if I was a stalker or not. Janice was nice enough to tell her that I was a very nice and polite gentleman and that she had nothing to worry about.
As we were finishing our conversation I stood up and Janice again apologized and I told her that it was an honest mistake and that it wasn't so bad being caught by a cute girl. It was better than being caught by some maintenance man. I left her office and went back upstairs to continue on with my day. I ended up moving out of that building months afterward, but while I still lived there Janice was still very nice and professional to me. Nothing ever happened between us, but she always gave a suspicious giggle if I ever got any plain brown packages that UPS or the mailman left in the managers office for me.
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#24548 - 09/03/04 11:38 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories - Apartment Mgr
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Amanda
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why do these stories sound hard to believe?
_________________________
~*~Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your mouth.~*~
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#24549 - 09/03/04 11:48 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories - Apartment Mgr
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lance
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cuz they are....really hard to believe. I think we have a budding author on our hands, just not quite sure of what!
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#24551 - 09/04/04 03:18 AM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories - Apartment Mgr
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SeanAmbrose
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In reply to:
why do these stories sound hard to believe?
Because you're from Washington DC, not Los Angeles. It's a different world out here and people are a lot more sexually liberated. This is after all, the porn capital of the world.
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#24552 - 09/04/04 06:26 AM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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Mao Tin Ovdung
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Thanks Lance.I'm feeling a little better as time passes but my wife is very distant. This is how distant she is. We have this junk room that is used just for storage,I wouldn't let a stray animal crash in there! That's where my wife set-up camp for the night. Reading all of the posts on this site has been great
and I'm surpised that seanambrose didn't have a trip wire or something hooked up to his front door! My wife tells her mother everything and her mother is very cool but, it would suck if I come out of this not being able to look her in the eye. I'll keep you all posted on how things go today,everyone is still asleep and we were supposed to go on a family outing to Manhattan. We'll see. 
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#24553 - 09/04/04 10:41 AM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories - Apartment Mgr
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Amanda
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Sorry I just don't believe your stories.
_________________________
~*~Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your mouth.~*~
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#24554 - 09/04/04 02:52 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories - Apartment Mgr
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SeanAmbrose
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I'm sorry you feel that way. I can't force you to.
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#24555 - 09/04/04 05:04 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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clymaxx
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June, your questions are good ones. The answers are a little complicated and take a lot of telling. They might be helpful to other dads and sons, and maybe even moms and daughters, although that's obviously not my area of expertise. (I also have a teen-age daughter, but my wife and I divided up the sexual counseling duties by gender. We tell each other much of what goes on in our conversations with the kids, but not everything--some aspects of guy-talk and girl-talk are off limits even for a parent.) Anyway, it's your thread, and if you're up to a longish read, I'll try to get at it later tonight. If not, say so. Most of the traffic on these boards is pretty short and sweet.
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#24556 - 09/04/04 11:56 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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Anonymous
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well i would love to hear your full story
im trying to get the behind the scenes info on these stories
and it doesnt matter how long it is
look forward to your reply
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#24557 - 09/05/04 09:17 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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RockyDude
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A relative convinced me to have sex w/her at age 5 or 6, after that I started to learn how to masturbate. At first behind the couch rubing my dick on a bar on the floor, my sister & brother knew what I was doing but my dad said "he's just laying there." (cause I used to lay on my stomach & pute my hands under me & stroke it until I was thirteen) Then when I started j/o in bed a little after that at night I must have been really going at it cause my brother in the bottom bunk told me if I don't stop he was going to tell mom (he's 9 yrs. older than me & probably thought I wasn't old enough to start j/o), & that was emberrassing. About 4-5 yrs. later, the most emberassing thing though is during the day I was going at it & my mom flew in the room & told me "u better stop doing that!" When my dad took the bunk beds down & put them on 1 side of the wall each I could j/o & turn my head to the hall so I could see if any1 was walking torwards the bedrooms, well 1 day I wasn't doing so when I was j/o then I looked towrards the doorway to the hall & saw my dad just standing their watching me j/o! When I looked at him he just smiled at me (the tension was thick, but I could also get the feeling that it was ok w/him if I j/o (I was around 11 or 12 when that happened) Oh, ya also last year my mom walked in my bedroom at night to see if I fell asleep w/the tv on when I was j/o! She just said go to sleep & turn the tv off & left (sigh) very emerrassing! By the way I'm 27 & live w/my mom & dad cause I going to school & apartments r expesive!
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#24558 - 09/05/04 11:26 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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clymaxx
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OK, here goes, although I may wind up having to do this in two sections.
MY DAD AND ME
I talked about the time my dad "caught" me with my hand around my erect penis, but the real first chapter to that story was the time I caught--or, really, watched--him doing himself. This was when I was about 13 and still in puberty, old enough to have discovered masturbation but not to get over feeling ashamed of doing it. My dad took me off on a fishing trip one weekend. I wasn't sure why, since he wasn't much of a fisherman himself and I had never expressed any interest in going. I figured, probably from a couple of Hemingway short stories, that is was some kind of dad thing--something fathers were supposed to do to bond with their sons. It wasn't until we got out in a rowboat on the lake, baited our hooks and put our lines in the water that I learned what the real reason was: We were going to have The Sex Talk.
It was awful, for him and for me. I had a pretty cool dad, as I realized the time he walked in on me, but he was fairly choked up with embarrassment. So was I--we sat there blushing at each other and struggling for words. He only gave me two really good pieces of advice. One was that my penis, which he'd glimpsed a few times, was big enough for the sex life ahead of meand I shouldn't worry about it. (I worried anyway, the way boys do, although it's about exactly average.) The other was how to buy condoms back in the days when they were still kept under the counter at drugstores. (Wait till the lady at the counter gets busy with somebody else and a man moves behind the register, and ask for "Trojans," a nice neutral word so you wouldn't have to say something embarrassing like "rubbers" or "prophylactics.")
Otherwise, he stammered through what would be happening to me in puberty as if it weren't all happening to me already--a bigger penis and testicles, pubic hair, erections, wet dreams, stuff I was already experiencing. He did a really short and vague walk around the subject of sex with a woman, even shorter and vaguer than my sex-ed class in junior high had been. (Neither version ever mentioned that friction or any motion at all was involved--you put your penis in a girl's vagina and planted the seed that made a baby. Made it sound kind of like gardening.) He never touched on the single subject I needed advice and reassurance on most urgently at that moment in my life--masturbation--and I was too tongue-tied with embarrassment to ask him about that or anything else.
He was still trying, unhappily, when I caught a fish--a small one, but enough to mercifully change the subject. I think we would both have gladly headed home then and there, but we were both prisoners of the concept of a weekend together, dad and son, so we made the best of it, which was not very good. Dinner was a silent nightmare, the two of us avoiding eye contact. Neither of us could wait to get back to our rented fishing cabin and get to bed.
Something woke me up really early the next morning, a rustling on my dad's cot, about five or six feet from mine. I was lying on my side, pointing toward him. I opened my eyes a tiny crack. He had kicked down the covers and was wriggling out of his boxers. His penis was already getting hard when he took it in one hand and began caressing it gently, slowly, with the other.
Watching him, I learned far more than I had from The Talk. I picked up some mechanical stuff, little tricks of technique that I use to this day, thirty years later. I learned to slow down the pace--like most boys new to the game, I thought the point was to get the semen spurting as fast as possible, but my dad took his time, and it was plain he was enjoying every moment on the journey.
It must have taken half an hour or more of stroking, stopping and stroking some more until his butt suddenly lifted off the bed and the semen started spurting onto his belly and pubic hair. I had been going crazy all that time. I was pretty notorious in my family for sleeping late and deep--my parents used to say I'd be capable of sleeping through World War III if it broke out in the street outside our house--so it wasn't hard for me to play dead to the world convincingly. Under the covers, though, my own penis was stiff and throbbing, and I didn't dare do anything more than hold it tight in one hand, trying to keep it from exploding. My dad finally got up and padded naked to the bathroom to clean up. When I heard the shower go on, I masturbated as quickly as I could into my underpants. In memory, it took about two strokes, give or take one. That may have been the last time I deliberately went for speed for its own sake. My dad had just taught me better--a precious lesson not just for self-pleasuring but for sex with a woman when I graduated to that level.
I had a school friend once who told me his father had stripped bare and demonstrated masturbation for him, all the way to orgasm. I didn't believe my friend, and I don't believe to this day that my dad meant me to see him. I think he just got horny, maybe just from having spent a few days thinking about sex to figure out what he was going to say to me, and he got off in the classic way of men without women. (I also don't think he noticed my own soggy briefs. I sure did--they were the only pair I brought and I had to wear them on the long drive back to town, feeling them go from damp to stiff around my privates.) We were better together that day, a father and son talking sports and stuff, as if nothing had happened.
Something did, for me, and it wasn't just about techniques. The biggest lesson I learned--the reason this tale is a prelude to the day my dad walked in on me--was that masturbation was probably OK after all. I had the usual teen-age boy's static with my dad, but he was still the main model for whatever ideas I had about being a man. If he jacked off, same as I did except at a way higher skill level, how could it be wrong for me?
Anyway, something about that weekend in the country made it easier for both of us, I think, when he walked in a couple of years later and caught me in my narcissistic moment in front of the mirror. (Narcissistic is all it was at that moment--I was really just admiring myself, though it's a fair bet which way a naked teen-age boy with a stiff dick in his hand will wind up going with it.) I think it helped him do his cool exit line, about leaving the two of us alone. I know it helped me go ahead and get off, for the first time without a twinge of shame.
And yes, we did have a conversation about the walk-in that same morning, when he was driving me to school. When we settled into the car, he asked me, "Did you have a good time this morning?" I'd assumed we would both pretend nothing happened, but when I looked over at him, I saw he was smiling at me--almost proudly, I thought--so I said, "Yeah, I did." It was then that we finished the Talk we had begun by the lake, only better, this time, without the unease and the red faces. He asked me how often I masturbated. To my surprise, I told him--a couple of times a day most days--and asked if that was overdoing it. He said no, all guys masturbated, more when they're younger; even he did sometimes, when he was on a road trip for business. (I smiled inwardly about that one.) There was nothing to be ashamed of or guilty about, it was perfectly normal, he and my mom just assumed I did it and didn't think any less of me for it. He said, as an aside, that he'd known since that fishing trip that I was doing myself--my mom had fished those semen-stiffened underpants out of the laundry hamper a couple of days later and showed them to him. He said they both had a good laugh.
I felt myself turn pink at that one, but I had to smile. Maybe that was the day I grew up.
[Note to June: I owe you a second post about me and my sons, but it's late, and this stuff is very personal and hard to write. I'll be back to you in a day or two with chapter two.]
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#24559 - 09/06/04 06:50 AM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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Diver
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LOL that brings back soooooooo many memories from the sex talk with my father:
dad: "I need to have a chat"
me: "ok"
dad: "do you know about it?"
me: "sorta"
dad: "good... now go make me a coffee"
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#24560 - 09/06/04 11:36 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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Anonymous
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clymaxx
thanks heaps for that in depth story
we all know these personal stories help so many people young and old
I understand its very personal but im sure everyone would love to hear about your experiences with your own children, it will be great to hear it from another angle
look forward to it
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#24561 - 09/06/04 11:51 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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123maggie
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clymaxx, not only a great story that we all appreciate you sharing, but i must say that you are an excellent writer!
looking forward to the next installment.
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#24562 - 09/07/04 01:10 AM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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clymaxx
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OK, here's chapter two, about "catching" my sons. I've changed their names--there are too many kids prowling sex-related sites (masturbation appears to be a particular magnet) and it would only one schoolmate finding their jacking adventures to make their lives sheer hell for a long while.
MY SONS AND ME
I've got two boys, Mark, who is just short of 16, and Phil, who's 13, and a girl, Annie, 14. My wife and I went with the usual division of labor--dads talk sex with sons and moms talk sex with daughters. It wasn't something you look forward to, but I was determined to do better than my own dad had done with me, so I started thinking about it long in advance.
I also wanted to catch my boys at the front edge of puberty--if you wait until they're deep into it, as my dad did with me, you're too late. With each of them, I had that first chat when I noticed their first wispy tufts of pubic hair. (We only have two bathrooms in our house, and we'd long since decided to split them up boy/girl rather than parents/kids. That meant my boys and I--and my wife and Annie--saw each other naked every day. As a result, when those hairs began to sprout, I noticed them. But it also meant that the talks went a little easier for my wife and me--a lot of barriers fall if you're naked together every day, even it it's just taking turns in the shower, and if your kids have seen you, they have a pretty good idea of where puberty is taking them.)
I talked to my sons separately, as they each came of age, but I covered the same ground with each of them and tried to hit the stuff they most needed to know. That meant giving them the ABCs about the changes in their bodies, the behavior of their sexual parts from erection to ejaculation, the likelihood that they'd get interested in girls, what happens when a boy and a girl get together. But I made extra sure to cover the ground my dad had missed, masturbation, which (except for wet dreams) is the first sexual experience most boy have. The core message was not just that masturbating was OK--I actually encouraged them to do it as a totally normal and healthy part of growing up and as great practice for the real thing. I told them that, like most adult males, I did it sometimes myself--it's a pleasure you can have all your life. I stressed to each of them, though, that it's a private act, and I promised them that if they closed their doors, no one would come barging in on them in the middle of anything.
Both talks went pretty well, I thought. Mark was the more responsive--he was the self-confident one, sure of his ground even then when he was 12--and he asked a bunch of good questions. One that made me flinch a little, inwardly, was how you masturbate. Was he asking me to show him? I wasn't about to do that, but I did tell him that most boys take their penises in one hand, get them hard and rub them up and down until they feel a great rush and some white stuff called semen squirts out.
Phil, by contrast, was a shy kid, skinny and bookish by nature. He didn't seem embarrassed by our conversation, but he just sat their taking it all in, never asking a single question. The only time it got a little awkward was when I started up on masturbation. I had the strong feeling that the subject wasn't new to him--that at the very least he'd seen his brother do it (they shared a bedroom) and maybe had already had his first real-life lessons.
Mark was 13 or maybe 14 when I first walked in on him. I had promised to drive him to the gym for basketball practice one Saturday, and the door to his room was wide open when I got there. I stepped in. He was lying naked on his bed, penis erect and pointed straight up, one hand stroking it furiously and the other cradling his balls. He saw me come in, but it was too late for him to stop or me to escape gracefully--the semen was already spurting up in the air and splashing down on his belly. I got a couple of tissues out of the box I had left (and regularly kept replenished) by his bedside and handed them to him. He took them and started wiping up. "You forgot the door," I told him, a little sheepishly. He looked up at me and smiled.
I saw him going at it a couple more times, once in the bathroom, once in his bedroom, in exactly similar circumstances: the door was no more than part-way closed. Both times, he was able to stop short of climax and let go, but his penis stayed erect, and he seemed totally unembarrassed. Once, he even pointed to his erection and asked me if I thought it was big enough to please a woman. I told him yes, plenty big enough, don't worry about a thing. Only later did I begin to wonder about the open doors, the confident smiles, the hard-ons that stayed hard. Mark is a cocky, even a reckless kid. (I dread the day he gets his driver's license.) Was the risk of getting caught part of the fun, an added bit of spice? Or was there some deeper, Oedipal thing: look what I've got, dad, and look what I can do with it? Or some of each? I don't know.
[To be continued]
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#24563 - 09/07/04 04:55 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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clymaxx
new member
Registered: 08/16/04
Posts: 79
Loc: IL
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Maggie, thanks for your kind words about my writing. I used to think that was what I would do in life, but it didn't quite work out that way--here I am a middle-management PR guy out in Corporate America, where the only writing I do is grave statements for the boss when the company's in trouble or celebratory speeches when we have a good quarter. Writing these little chapters out of my distant and recent past may be painful--I grew up in a generation when boys didn't even admit to each other that they "played with themselves," let alone tell the whole world--but it's still a welcome change from my day job. You're nice to write.
Edited by clymaxx (09/07/04 04:57 PM)
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#24564 - 09/07/04 09:28 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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clymaxx
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MY SONS AND ME, continued:
Mark and I talked after each of those episodes. On my part, it was mostly a booster shot on my original sermon about how masturbation is good and good for you. He obviously didn't need reinforcement, judging by his easy reaction to my intrusions--he knew before the first one that I was OK with jacking and he wasn't going to catch any hell from me. The talks did open up to some fresh ground, particularly the one in which he asked me about the size of his penis. He told he he had measured his and it was 6 inches erect. I told him that was exactly the same as mine, when I last measured it around his age, and while I wouldn't recommend him asking his mom about it, I hadn't heard her complain in the 20+ years we'd been together.
We had a wonderfully open relationship for a couple of years--he felt free to ask questions about anything sexual and I felt easy trying to answer then as well and as plainly as I could. When he began hanging out with girls, we talked about the mechanics of sex and a little about techniques--I have to confess I felt a little hesitancy there. I got him a bunch of condoms, even though kids can buy them now a whole lot more easily than they could when I was his age, and told him how to put them on properly.
He came to me one day and asked if you were supposed to use them if you were getting oral sex. I told him yeah, it was sad but true--if you have even a tiny scratch or raw spot on your penis, you can catch STDs that way, and these days some STDs can kill you. He looked down, and we lost eye contact for a moment. He told me a girl had given him and another guy BJs after basketball practice that afternoon, and neither of them had put on a condom. He may have expected a chewing-out. I just put a hand on his shoulcer, looked him in the eye, and said, "Next time, OK?"
That open channel between us was wonderful while it lasted, but it started closing when he hooked up with a real girlfriend just a few months ago. The world being what it is now, I assume that they're having intercourse, but he hasn't told me so, and I'm not going to violate our relationship by asking. I'm proud of him, in one sense--I guess it's a guy thing to want our sons to be studs and our daughters to be vestal virgins. But I can't tell you how wistful I felt as a dad, losing that intimate line of communication I'd never really had with my own father. Relations between fathers and adolescent sons are always going to be complicated, but Mark and I had done pretty well at it--even had a kind of pal thing going for a long time. I'd literally watched him grow from baby to little boy to young manhood. I'd seen him masturbate, which, for a guy,is our farewell to childhood and our first step toward becoming a man. I'd counseled him through the next few steps on that path. And then suddenly, even though he still lives under my roof, he was gone. He was no longer Max's boy, he was Mark, his own man with his own life. In a real way, he had flown the nest.
Phil is a different kind of kid, and he's still a work in progress. I love them equally--they're just not the same. Mark is bold, Phil is reticent. Mark is sports, Phil is books. Mark is self-confident, Phil--well, let's say Phil has a ways to go. I've talked about my introduction-to-sex talks with them. Mark's demeanor was let me at it. Phil's was I'll wait and see.
He had an odd puberty--when he was barely 12, his voice dropped, his pubic hair sprouted, his penis and testicles grew, but nothing else changed. He was having wet dreams (or so my wife informed me, having found the evidence in his underpants and on his sheets), but when I would see him naked in the bathroom, he looked as if somebody had pasted a teen-ager's genitalia onto a ten-year-old boy.
It was the adolescent I saw the day I walked in on him masturbating. I had come home from work a little early to pack for a business trip, and I headed for the bathroom to pee and collect my shaving stuff for the road. The door was open, and there stood Phil, naked and erect, pressed up to the wash basin and stroking like crazy. We saw one another at the same time. Both of us froze. He dropped his hand. His penis melted down in a heartbeat. And suddenly he burst into tears, bawling almost like a baby. It wasn't the adolescent Phil I was looking at any more--it was a badly distressed little boy.
On instinct, I grabbed a bath sheet from the rack and wrapped it around him, not to hide his nakedness--that had never been an issue between us--but to cover his mortification. I sat on the edge of the bathtub, pulled him to me, hugged him hard and told him over and over, "It's all right, it's all right, it's all right." I held him until he had cried himself out, then sat him down beside me, put my arm around him, and went back over the ground I thought we had covered in my tutorial. The scene was too painful for me to remember my exact words, but it went something like, it's okay, it's not bad, it's not dirty, it's not naughty, it's not something you need to be crying about. It's good. It's natural. It's healthy. Your brother does it. Your dad does it. All guys do it, not just boys but grown men, too. It's part of growing up, of finding out how your parts work and practicing how to use them when you need them. I told him that not only was I not mad at him, I was proud of him--he was his daddy's young man.
If someone else had walked in at that moment, we probably would have made a ridiculous picture, Yoda and Gandhi, a slightly overweight middle-age man and a skinny kid draped in a towel, their butts lodged uncomfortably on the he hard, narrow edge of a bathtub. But no one came in. Phil's tears had stopped. He looked up at me finally and melted my heart with a smile. We stood up. I slapped his backside and winked down at him. "Remember everything I just told you," I said, "only next time, remember the door, too."
Phil took at least that lesson to heart--I never "caught" him alone again. But I did find the two of them at it together one time. It was a Sunday, the Cubs were playing a day game, and I had promised to take them. Mark must have had the door detail that day, because it was just shy of half open when I trudged back to their bedroom to get them moving.
They weren't in exactly the motion I had hoped for. Instead of showering and dressing, they were lying naked on their twin beds, penises vertical--Phil had obviously learned technique from Mark--and right hands pounding like mad, as if (after all I had told them about taking it slow) they were racing to see who could come first. They saw me a split second apart. Phil dropped his hand, and his penis slowly wilted, but there were no tears this time--his body had finally grown to fit his privates, and he wasn't a little boy any more. Mark kept hold of his erection and smiled--I guessed that he would carry on once I left and maybe tempt Phil to join him.
I have to confess that I was glad they hadn't been masturbating one another. I know that a fair number of boys do that. I also know it doesn't say anything about their sexual orientations, and besides, if one or both my boys should grow up gay, how could I not love them anyway? Me finding them doing each other just would have reopened the whole shame thing on their part and required a whole lot more complicated mentoring on mine.
At that moment, all I wanted to do was get them to the ball game, and what the hell, we had a little flex time if they had unfinished business to tend to. So I eased out of the room and as I closed the door tight behind me, I spoke the exit line my dad had calmed me with thirty years before. "I guess," I said, "I should leave you two alone."
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#24565 - 09/07/04 10:10 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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lance
longstanding member
Registered: 10/15/00
Posts: 3236
Loc: Northeast U.S.
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I just want give you a high 5 and round of applause! What a great dad you are, open, willing to have those tough talks and so honest and open about masturbation, sex and all things male with your sons. I wish my Dad and I had been able to talk like that and experience things in that way. Unfortunately I learned it all the hard way, and alot of it really inaccurate...spent a number of years in guilt and shame about my equipment and didn't understand why I was "different" than the others I saw (I'm uncut) As someone who works with adolescents in a school setting our job would be so much easier if kids came to us with the relationships and talks you've had with your sons. I hope they grow up to be just like you and raise their sons the same way!
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#24566 - 09/07/04 11:11 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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Anonymous
Anonymous
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thanx clymaxx
i think everyone who reads that will be grateful
what a great story
your kids sound liked real characters
thanx again
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#24567 - 09/08/04 12:23 AM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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clymaxx
new member
Registered: 08/16/04
Posts: 79
Loc: IL
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High fives back, Lance--I've read, enjoyed and admired many of your posts--and thanks for your nice words about mine. God, I hope I'm not the only dad who puts a little extra effort into the business of mentoring sons about sex--my own dad did in spite of his fumbling start and in a major way liberated me the day long ago when he caught me with my penis in my hand and greenlighted me to start pumping. Puberty is a tough time even with the most supportive parents, and I cling to the hope that young moms and dads coming up today understand that. Ive been flying blind through the whole thing and am happy that my boys have lost some of that tension that goes with the dawn of sexuality. I think your kids, if and when you have them, will do better still, because you're so keenly aware from experience of what doesn't work. Because of that awareness, I'm proud to have your compliments.
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#24568 - 09/08/04 12:35 AM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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clymaxx
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Registered: 08/16/04
Posts: 79
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Thanks to you, too, June, for tolerating (let alone appreciating) my tome on what is after all your thread. Yeah, my boys are characters, and so is my daughter, whom I've called Annie. My wife could tell similar tales about tutoring her in female sexuality. She won't--she's not particularly thrilled with my going public, particularly the fact that she's hearing one or two of the episodes here for the first time, including the tale of her two sons masturbating together. That's a teen guy thing that women have a hard time getting. So you may have ruined my marriage (LOL) but you may have helped some other dad or dad-to-be deal a little more comfortably with their kids' sexuality. I hope.
Edited by clymaxx (09/08/04 12:38 AM)
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#24569 - 09/08/04 03:56 AM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories - Neighbor
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freakinb0269
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Registered: 09/07/04
Posts: 18
Loc: Illinois
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I was in my room and my brother's girl friend (ex now) came in the room to ask me something. You should have seen the look on her face when she saw what I was doing. But then she closed the door and finished me off with her hand. (Guess that's why she's an ex now)Embarrassing but enjoyable.
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#24570 - 09/08/04 02:44 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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Diver
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Registered: 08/03/01
Posts: 3943
Loc: looking thru your gf's window
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I swear I've printed most of this out for future reference... cheers 
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#24571 - 09/08/04 05:03 PM
Re: Caught Masturbating Stories
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clymaxx
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Registered: 08/16/04
Posts: 79
Loc: IL
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Thanks, Diver. I don't consider myself a model anything, and when you're parenting a houseful of teen-agers, sex is almost the easiest part of the job. It's not at all as if we lead a static-free life--it's just that in, this one zone, my wife and I agreed to take a chance on candor, and (my fingers are crossed) it appears to be working out.
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