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#304255 - 01/11/08 08:59 PM
Lol.... here again.
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Nny
Registered: 04/18/07
Posts: 883
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I dunno why I feel compelled to post here again. things have gotten better then they were... My outlook on life is overall better...
But, it seems as though there is still this.. oddity.. While at the moment I'm ok.. I keep having these downward spirals.. illogical.. I dislike it..
I was in a really... really rocky relationship recently.. (lol I'm a sucker for some people)... So that sorta brought me down some....
To make matters worse right as the relationship ended college was let out.. (for the last 2 weeks of the semister I was a royal mess lol).. Then I have been home for the last few months.. which i think also contributes a lot to it..
I'm really tired of randomly feeling like I'm down... or I think more common then the downward feeling is random feelings of just getting "worked up" so to speak.. not in an angry fashion.. but, just like random tension.. Almost like a little kid about to get a shot.. maybe not that bad.. but, its a good generalization.
I dunno if I would say its been "depression" I've had.. but, I can't say I care for feeling like a weight is tied to my heart. (literally feels like that not being poetically emo XD).
I think it will help once I get back in college and out of the house again.. i do so dislike being home...for a plethora of reasons.. anywho.. thanks for listening..
Edited by Nny (01/11/08 09:00 PM)
_________________________
This cut is constantly bleeding
But I know that I am wrong
Lay your head down so you don't remember
Everything you are and everything I've done
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#304269 - 01/12/08 05:12 AM
Re: Lol.... here again.
[Re: Nny]
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LittleQ
Registered: 03/24/07
Posts: 140
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I dunno if I would say its been "depression" I've had.. but, I can't say I care for feeling like a weight is tied to my heart.
DAMN! Have I been there! I know exactly how you feel. My place back home depresses the hell out of me too. I have a very bad problem with relaxing; my neck muscles are so tight most of the time that I can get headaches if I don't go to sleep to let them relax.
I think more common then the downward feeling is random feelings of just getting "worked up" so to speak.. not in an angry fashion.. but, just like random tension.. Almost like a little kid about to get a shot.. maybe not that bad.. but, its a good generalization.
Sometimes my mind wonders off onto a certain topic and I later realise that I am thinking about something stressful like usual and my heart is pounding.
I've found a couple ways to deal with it. First, I have a lot of networking/forums on the Internet to help me go do anything if I find myself obsessing over something trivial and getting all worked up. Second, I have my coffee and tea. Depending on how you react to caffeine, a nice hot beverage and a calm simple-plot book can really help to calm the nerves. Third, I have managed to find a few things that I really like to study (including my major  ), and when I feel like crap, I sometimes just get on Wiki or go to the library and start reading anything random about something that interests me. Again, I like to keep plots out of the book since they only complicate the emotional involvement that would have to go along with reading and so don't help much to shake the emotions.
I don't know how well these solutions really work. I know that they get my mind off the trivial things over which I am obsessing, but they don't help me to stop obsessing over them, if you know what I mean.
_________________________
"...she's like all the rest..."
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#304316 - 01/12/08 05:35 PM
Re: Lol.... here again.
[Re: LittleQ]
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Nny
Registered: 04/18/07
Posts: 883
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actually my "internal clock" so to speak has me very nocturnal. (always have been) and its weird because its really late at night when I find myself trying to learn. I do so dearly want to learn to hack and such (I mean that in a broad sense not a malitious sense).
my problem is html isn't a very practical programming language for me to start off with seeing as I have no desire to actually make a web page.
I find scrubs helps me more then anything.. Although I don't think it has gotten to the point I find myself physically tense >.<.. Then again if I were I probably wouldn't notice it >.<
Although I will definitely try reading. I really appreciate the advice.
Edited by Nny (01/12/08 05:35 PM)
_________________________
This cut is constantly bleeding
But I know that I am wrong
Lay your head down so you don't remember
Everything you are and everything I've done
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#304330 - 01/12/08 06:36 PM
Re: Lol.... here again.
[Re: Nny]
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StillSearching
Registered: 06/06/07
Posts: 1074
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If you want to get into programming, I've found a great place to start is with a program called mIRC. It's an IRC client (IRC is Internet Relay Chat, it's basically hundreds of thousands of chat rooms on each server, and you can connect to any server or whatever) with a simple script language included. It has certain limitations, but I think it's a good place to start scripting just to understand the basics of how scripts work and what you can do with them.
If you're interested in that, let me know and I can help you out.
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#304435 - 01/13/08 12:54 AM
Re: Lol.... here again.
[Re: StillSearching]
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Nny
Registered: 04/18/07
Posts: 883
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Actually thats a good idea, I already have been using IRC for a while but, I never really did get into scripting.. I personally use leafchat but, yeah I'm game its as good a place to start as any. I'll take any help with that I can get.
Edited by Nny (01/13/08 01:00 AM)
_________________________
This cut is constantly bleeding
But I know that I am wrong
Lay your head down so you don't remember
Everything you are and everything I've done
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#304437 - 01/13/08 01:07 AM
Re: Lol.... here again.
[Re: Nny]
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StillSearching
Registered: 06/06/07
Posts: 1074
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Name your server/channel you want to meet at
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#304445 - 01/13/08 01:45 AM
Re: Lol.... here again.
[Re: StillSearching]
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Nny
Registered: 04/18/07
Posts: 883
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I'm indifferent as the the server. My name is usually trigger or nicholas.
_________________________
This cut is constantly bleeding
But I know that I am wrong
Lay your head down so you don't remember
Everything you are and everything I've done
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