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#9918 - 03/23/04 08:41 AM Keeping an erection
Anonymous Anonymous Unregistered	Hi I'm 17 and i've had this problem twice already with my girlfriend. I can get an erection, but once the time comes to put on a condom I lose it almost instantly. She was my first, and the very first time we were going to do it I lost it and it just made things harder for the next times. Ever since then, we had sex twice and it was incredible. Last night we were getting into it again, and as soon as I put it on I lost it. I was so embarrassed, it wouldn't even go up again. She thinks it is because I am not attracted to her and it's not true. She's so hot. She was scared I am just too nervous to have sex, but after we had it I wasn't at all... I just wanted more! I seriously doubt that's why, because I am positive that I want it. I've noticed that the 2 times I've lost it, I had a slight need to pee... could this be related to losing it? I've experienced that masturbating and i've never lost it then. It's funny, I can keep the erection the whole time until it's time to put on the condom, maybe that's what turns me off? I'm scared that I'm 17 and I already need viagra :-(
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#9919 - 03/23/04 09:03 AM Re: Keeping an erection
Anonymous Anonymous Unregistered	If you needed Viagra you would not have been able to get it up in the first place. Don't worry about it. Just be honest with your gf. Tell her that putting on the condom is distracting. If you lose it, continue foreplay until it gets back up. I'm sure your gf would not mind the pleasure and attention of foreplay. Also, there are condoms which are made to slip on quickly. They are kind of expensive, 3 will cost you the price of 6 regular condoms.
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#9920 - 03/23/04 10:18 AM

Re: Keeping an erection

ShyHarmony
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Registered: 03/20/04
Posts: 225
Loc: Nebraska "Moo!"

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I have an idea you could try. Maybe try having your gf put on the condom for you or maybe she could use her mouth to put it on. That way you would still get sexual and not have to stop foreplay to put the condom on. Her putting it on could be part of the foreplay itself. Just a thought.

_________________________
*~*~*~*~* "Happily taken and protected by the man I love and who I know loves me." <3

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#9921 - 03/23/04 03:59 PM Re: Keeping an erection
Anonymous Anonymous Unregistered	I have been completely honest with her. She says it doesn't bother her, but deep down she thinks it's because I don't find her attractive -- but that's a whole other problem. I'm very comfortable around her and it's not because I'm nervous. I just can't keep it up when slipping on the condom, to be fair, it's only happened twice, but I am so embarrased. When we got into it before, the sex was unbelieveable, and we have both said that it's something we want to do again. Why?! Why am i so awkward?
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#9922 - 03/23/04 07:04 PM

Re: Keeping an erection

Steppenwolf
member

Registered: 01/24/04
Posts: 782
Loc: The Shower. No peeking, you pe...

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Don't worry about it. I've had the exact same thing happen to me. It's pretty common. I've also had the same situation with a gf- hot, but worried that I wasn't attracted to her.

The first time it happened you were probably quite nervous, or it was just random (it happens). The subsequent times you probably started going limp the moment you started worrying about going limp. That's the thing about limpness-if you think about it, it will happen.

Here's my advice: Don't masturbate for a while (but do fantasize about sex). When you're about to have sex, you'll probably be so horny that the thought of limpness won't even cross your mind as you put on the condom. I know it sounds crazy, but it worked for me. Once you get out of your rut, you'll be home free from then on

_________________________
Cheers

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#9923 - 03/24/04 10:52 PM Re: Keeping an erection
Anonymous Anonymous Unregistered	Great, it happened again tonight :-( I had one all day and we got back to her place and she got in the shower to "prepare" and i had it the whole time but as soon as she got out I lost it... not even a condom this time... what's wrong with me...but she's so hot!
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#9924 - 03/25/04 12:10 PM

Re: Keeping an erection

focus
longstanding member

Registered: 10/13/00
Posts: 2609

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Don't be afraid to touch or stroke or masturbate your penis to get it hard in front of her. It sounds like you're only relying on spontaneous, hands free erections only. It often takes some physical stimulation to the penis to get hard, and there's nothing wrong at all with that. Also, get her involved too - have her stroke your cock for you before sex, or give you a blow job, etc. Foreplay is important to good sex, and quality erections.

_________________________
My avatar is a picture of my own sperm under a microscope. Pretty cool huh?
Drugs are garbage. I'm high on my own testosterone.

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#9925 - 03/25/04 01:00 PM Re: Keeping an erection
Anonymous Anonymous Unregistered	We've tried it all. Maybe I'm just too nervous and I'm not ready for sex yet. Thanks for the advice guys.
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#9926 - 03/25/04 05:46 PM

Re: Keeping an erection

secret_searcher
member

Registered: 03/09/04
Posts: 476
Loc: africa

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dude1,you're putting wat to much pressure on yourself!
hang out with your girl and relax.she wants you before your penis.

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#9927 - 03/25/04 05:49 PM

Re: Keeping an erection

Ineligible
Administrator

Registered: 08/09/01
Posts: 15581

Online

I think it is nerves. I suggest not trying to have sex for the moment, and then one day you'll catch it unawares.

This is something that is very embarrassing now, but eventually you'll get over it and it won't be a problem.

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#9928 - 03/27/04 02:24 AM Re: Keeping an erection
Anonymous Anonymous Unregistered	success! i tried not to think about it and relaxing, and once we started it wasn't a problem from there. thank you all for the advice
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